Redding Got Wietersed

Adventures at the YardJune 17, 2009. Jones bobble heads in hand, we headed to the bleachers in center. Strangely, that didn’t last long as we were given the boot by a small group…of 53…from Oregon. Apparently, the Mets snuck out of New York the night the Yankees were dominated and let Swisher pitch. Too embarrassed to be in the same state, I suppose. More embarrassing, however, is Gabe Kapler struck out with Swisher on the mound throwing his ‘changeup.’ I digress.

Like circus folk, we moved on to right field, practically on Ryan Church, a perfect spot to unleash…the homo-heckle. I told Church he looked great in his pants and he should pray I don’t jump the rail. Hot and bothered, he moved closer. I loudly whispered he was so close I could feel his heart beat. Then, the unexpected occurred. Through the art of mime, he placed his hand in his jersey and gestured his heart beating! Well played, sir.

WietersedOn a side note, Wieters hit the first homerun of his Major League career. No big deal.


No big deal?! That shit was awesome! Redding got wietersed. It gave me and the soft-skinned gentlemen alongside me goose bumps. Oh, and we won. Boing. Mets 4. Orioles 6. W

Johnny Utah


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