If you are reading this, then you probably already know that earlier this week we had our first ever Eutaw Street Hooligans Fantasy Baseball Draft. If you aren’t reading this, then you were not one of the 16 participants in the draft because we pretty much had every reader of our site participate. It was a crazy night, and there is plenty to recap like why Pedroia sucks, Kevin Lomax becoming number one on Camden Chat’s shit list and the dangers of “Autodraft.”
Let’s start with a fantasy draft warning for everyone. For obvious reasons I made it clear as the draft was about to begin that anyone who attempted to draft “Him Who We Shall Not Speak Of” (or for those who don’t know what I am talking about, the first baseman for the New York Yankees) would be officially dead to me. Well as it turns out, Johnny Eutaw himself was unable to make our little draft and was therefore subject to the whims of Yahoo’s pre-ranking system. “And with the 8th pick in this years draft It’s Business Time selects first baseman M&%# F’ing T&%$@#!*. Let this be a warning to all fantasy participants, if you must autodraft, please put this man on your “do not draft” list or it could happen to you.
Speaking of enemies. Our friend, Russ Smith, tried telling us that Dustin Pedroia in 2008 had a better season than ANY Oriole in the past 10 years! Wow, that’s a bold statement, especially since it is false. Not only has an Oriole in the last 10 years had a better season, but an Oriole of the same position has had a better season. Let’s take a look at a comparison of Dustin Pedroia’s 2008 season and Brian Roberts’ 2005 season. First Dustin Pedroia, in 2008 he had a batting average of .326 but only put up 50 walks in 726 plate appearances for an on base percentage of .376 and had 54 doubles to help him slug .493 to put up a respectable .869 OPS. He also grounded into 17 double plays and stole 20 bases. Apparently an MVP season. However, let’s now look at Brian Roberts in 2005. He had a batting average of .314 but put up 67 walks in 86 less plate appearances than Pedroia’s 2008 season giving Brian an on base percentage of .387 which is higher than that of Pedroia. Brian only hit 45 doubles in his 640 plate appearances but it still helped him put up a .515 slugging percentage and a .903 OPS. Roberts also stole 27 bases and only grounded into 6 double plays. So let’s review (math isn’t my best subject so bear with me)… If Player B got on base at a higher rate than Player A while also getting further along the base paths during that time as well as stealing more bases and making less double plays then how is Player A the superior player? Nevermind, I was never any good at word problems either.
I could recap the whole draft for you, but I won’t cause that is a lot of reading. I will offer analysis of some type for you so you aren’t in the dark. So without further adieu, here is my official analysis of Round 18 out of 23: It didn’t really stand out, other than for some reason Alex Charlie Conway drafted Jim Johnson. I think he was still upset because he had a spelling test the next day and I had been telling him all night I was going to “Gordon Bombay” his mother. This is also the round where Kevin Lomax became #1 onCamden Chat‘s Shit List. It’s better said in her own words, so hopefully Stacey doesn’t mind that I lifted this from their site:
Oh, and one more thing. Do y’all know the Eutaw Street Hooligans? Nice boys (or so I thought). They invited me to take part in their bloggers fantasy baseball league and the draft was last night. I’d been telling them from the get go that I’d be drafting Felix Pie. You know, sort of as my mascot. The last pick is always a throw away. Now, I thought we had a gentleman’s agreement over the whole thing (can you have a gentleman’s agreement if one of you is a lady?) and then, in I think the 21st round, that scoundral Kevin Lomax took Felix! Can you believe it? I’m not at liberty to tell you what I said when it happened due to this being the front page, but I’m sure you can all imagine. Because of this I declare Kevin Lomax to be Camden Chat Public Enemy #1.
Stacey, we’re not all bad. Just most of us.
Well that’s it, the recap of our fantasy draft. Until we can post official analysis of everyone’s team I will just leave you knowing that my team is by far the class of the league because I stuck to my solid game plan of not drafting anyone who plays in New York or Boston.
Until next time, Go O’s!
~ Jjaks Clayton