Monthly Archives: July 2010

Non-baseball Related Editorial

But it is Orioles related.  My buddy just passed me this music video.  Not my kind of music but it is a pretty gnarly video.  It even has unicorns fucking.

What I think this video teaches us is that if you watch the Orioles while tripping, it’s a better experience.  What do you think the video means?

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UPDATED: Before We Start Getting Too Buck Nasty

I saw this commercial last night and had to pass it on with my thoughts of how it could have been better.  Note: the sound isn’t great but it has graphics so it’s not needed.

Now instead of Kakes being the O’s representative, wouldnt it have been better if it was Tejada?

Miguel Tejada, currently has one hit off Niemann but it hit him the fucking chest, knocking him out of the game.

Niemann.  Tejada.  Who will own it?

The answer is no.  It wouldn’t.  Because there has never been such thing as a three team game which would have to happen for Miggy to appear in this one.  Good luck with the Whales Vagina Dads.  Enjoy that one post season series you will probably see.

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Switch Hitting Jesus?

No.

But he’s like Moses or something.

How long until the first Buck Showalter Facts website starts up?

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“Hit The F’in Ball out the F’in Ballpark”

If you read my post from earlier today you understand why I might be wasting time on youtube looking at Earl Weaver videos.

I found this one:

I’m not sure it’s real.  It’s just hard to tell.  I mean, I know the dude was coarse but wow.  He’s like my new fucking idol.

Also how funny are his Terry Crowley comments?  Can you believe he’s still around?

But then I found this:

It’s incredible isn’t it?  Do you think Earl would have ever thought he’d be auto-tuned?  Fuck no.

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Manager of My Expectations

I work in the client service industry.  It’s all about giving the client an enjoyable experience.  Usually this means great product, on time, and on budget.  Other times it means kissing their ass.

A big part of this is managing expectations.  So at the last week before the non-waiver deadline, I’m stuck checking every baseball outlet every second I can, waiting for the big news.  We traded someone.  But, possibly more importantly, when are they going to announce a managerial hire?

See the trade deadline is a hard date.  I know when it ends.  I have to assume that Andy knows too.  And, with all the calls and interest we’ve been getting in Wiggy, Scott, Tejada, Guts, hell even Patterson, I have to assume that a deal will eventually happen.  At least one.  Hopefully.

But the manageraial search could go on forever.  How long does interim last?  It’s as long as you want it to be.  So I grow anxious.  I want something to happen.  Anything.  Andy has stated that he’s on his own timeline.  I get that.  But manage my expectations a little better.  Saying stuff like this doesn’t help:

“I said [previously it] could be days, could be weeks, could be months, could be years. I try to give myself the full spectrum. There are so many variables. I don’t know how the process is going to unfold.”

Ugh.

The only glimmer of hope I have is that he also said this after the 4 game sweep of the Rangers:

They’ll be critical of me because we have not declared on the manager yet. There’s nothing worse you can do to the media then hanging something out there that’s going to happen, one way or the other, whether Juan (Samuel) got full status or whether you bring someone in from external…Over the last three weeks the team has been playing a little over .500 and Juan is doing fine.

Juan is not doing fine. The team is 2-8 since the break.  Really carried that momentum over didn’t we?

His team isn’t playing baseball. They are playing stick ball on an East Baltimore street in 1962.  That’s the level we are playing at right now.  We even have Timothy, he’s a little “slow” my mom says, playing shortstop.  He can get in front of a grounder fine but he can’t hit a lick.

Now we head to Canada (stay out of trouble Adam) with a team waiting for us that is over .500 but only because they’ve played us 9 times.  In those 9 games we’ve been outscored 15-48.  We haven’t won any.  Who hates Canada even more now?  Me.

I’m a little torn on what exactly is the best timing to announce it for the sake of the team as a whole.  I know I want it announced 4 weeks ago, but I’m as selfish as Wiggin-ton.  Just thinking out-loud (to the internet) but couldn’t we announce the manager and say Juan is trying to earn his spot on the staff so he doesn’t totally give up.  The players are auditioning to keep their jobs (though this could back fire).  Not sure.  What do you think?  When will the O’s announce the new (or permanent, dear god no) manager?

Anyway.  With every minute that ticks by and nothing happens, my desire for the next minute grows by one Couric.  Should be a fun week.

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Wiggin-ton Selfishly Argues Obvious Out

First of all, we need more of this action!

But…

Was Wigginton arguing the call because it was quite clearly a fucking out (maybe two, considering he tagged both hands) and wanted to get the team pumped?

Or…

Had Wigginton got word of Mike Gonzalez treating the Tides to a smorgasbord of seafood recently and shellfishly (hiyo!) made an early exit in hopes of devouring an ocean’s worth of crustaceans?

I’ll take the latter.

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The O’s – A Bill Withers Odyssey

Don’t get me wrong.  When it’s the offseason, all I can do is think about you.

And every spring it’s like a fresh start.  Things feel right with the world.  I awake refreshed.  Rejuvenated.  Optimistic.

And then the inevitable.  Do you know what it’s like trying to defend you.  Especially after you get me in a crowd of people and act real rude to me?  Why can’t you love me like I love you?

My friends feel it’s their appointed duty to tell me that  I shouldn’t just let you walk on me.  But they don’t know what I know.

I want Showalter but when I passed Juan Samuel, he stared me down.  I looked at you and you looked at the ground.  Something in my heart and in your eyes, tells me he’s just not someone passing by.

Statements like this don’t give me much to look forward to:

They’ll be critical of me because we have not declared on the manager yet. There’s nothing worse you can do to the media then hanging something out there that’s going to happen, one way or the other, whether Juan (Samuel) got full status or whether you bring someone in from external…Over the last three weeks the team has been playing a little over .500 and Juan is doing fine.

The good news is, you are getting your ass kicked lately (really, good news?).  Sure the thriller in extras was fun.  But all you showed was you could ruin a perfectly decent night if it weren’t for Cesar doing something totally out of character (hitting).  And, how did you follow up that performance?  Another public humiliation.

But no matter what I do, at the end of the day…it’s just me and you.

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