We’ve all heard the age old anecdote “If you don’t have anything nice to say then don’t say anything at all” so here are my thoughts on Endy Chavez:
On second thought, fuck that, I have some stuff to say. This guys sucks, how is he employed in the major leagues? Let’s take a look at his career and try to find a reason why he continues to con teams into signing and then somehow playing him year in and year out. I don’t feel like spending a lot of time so let’s just look at his 162 game average over the course of his 11 MLB seasons.
- Career Batting Average of .270 – Not bad, but what kind of hits is he getting?
- Averages 20 doubles per 162 games – Joey Votto already has 14 doubles so far this season in 30 games
- Averages 4 HR per 162 games – As an outfielder. Where is the value? He must at least walk a lot
- 26 BB per year – Ok, so he doesn’t walk a lot. What else can he offer, when he gets on he must be a threat on the bases
- 17 SB for 23 attempts for a 162 game average – So he doesn’t steal bases either?
- Slugging percentage of .368 – Could only be worse by adding his OBP to get his .678 career OPS
Endy does not approve of this post
So, in review this guy has 24 career dingers, walks as much as Samuel L Jackson in Unbreakable and is under a 75% success rate for stealing bases. What else can’t he do? I made a list:
- Insert the straw into a Capri Sun
- Program a VCR
- Operate a Universal Remote
- Keep his papers securely on a desk without the use of a paper weight
- Whistle
- Find Waldo
- Beat a small child at Tic-Tac-Toe
- Beat Glass Joe in Mike Tyson’s Punch Out
Too many to list really, but feel free to submit your own.
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